Music Keeps Your Spirits Up... and Not in a Good Way

One thing I hate about music.... it keeps me awake all night even when I need to really get some ZZzzzzzs. Something about it keeps me awake. Its been like this since... ever since... ever since... gosh. I think its been like this since I can remember. That makes it grade school. I keep the music turned on at night... and I just go on and on and on....

For goodness sakes, tomorrow's Monday morning. I DO have a job to go to.

An Intermission

Vienna Teng rocks. Obviously I got hold of her CD the day after my last mention of her newest album (its not so new anymore... its been out two years). Awesome. So was Jason Mraz. And Ayaka.

On the other hand, I've been watching movies galore: Journey to the Center of the Earth (3D version), Get Smart, Hellboy 2: The Golden Army, Cyborg She. What a tiring week. And I've run out of new movies to watch, so I eventually resorted to watching The Devil Wears Prada tonight.

Anything wrong with me? Not really. Just have the terrible urge to feed my consumeristic tendencies. And the fact that I seem to be sucking in everything that could be drawn in, read and reread. Pretty much like a sponge right now... just seem to be quite ravenous, really.

I will be rereading Buber's Ich und Du (I and Thou) for the next few days. I imagine it would keep me quite occupied immensely, so likely I will not be posting anything at all, until the book has been finished.

Up in the list, Buber's translation of the Bible, Kant's Critique of Pure Reason, and possibly followed by Freud's Das Ich und das Es (The Ego and the Id). And all this, starting to prompt me to start learning German......

To end the post to celebrate the culmination of my past week, a snippet from Blake, one of my favorite poets:

To see a world in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an Hour

Strangely enough... something similar, yet different, and quite unconsciously written previously without any prompt from anything or anyone.

POST: I've spend most of my time lazying the day away along the pier, early in the morning, and at dusk. I'm glad live nearby... its a beautiful place. And so, anytime I sense the stirring of restlessness, that is the place to be... I'm really glad.

A Prologue for the Lonely

Buber, Blake, Heidegger, Kant, St Augustine.

I can see now where most of my perceptions come from. Its amazing how some philosophies crawl directly into who you are and how you define yourself.

And exactly how they came to be? It came to BE, from a institution that I would fondly call my alma mater.

Its not enough that one has to excel in their field of specialization, but to become one that mattered was equally as important. And thus, 4 years - and along the path of compulsory 16 units of Philosophy , and 16 units of Theology courses - we learn that we are agents of change - socially responsible for our fellowmen, responsible for the lives of others, forwarding an ideal purpose towards the greater glory of God.

I'm quite glad and honored to be part of a long legacy that started with St. Ignatius. When I was accepted into this university, for the first time in my long relationship with my brother, he gave me a gift to celebrate the occasion - This coming from a man who has never given me anything, fought with me throughout my childhood, and persistently tried to kick me out of the room when he was playing or doing anything at all. It really IS a great honor to be part of being an Atenean.

In any case, life after university is drastically different. Maybe not all lessons are learned then, but it imparted me with the arsenal to deal with what cannot be learned directly within the confines of school.

I will find out later in life, that exactly what made me grateful, and exceptional, in the background, will spawn one of the most pivotal and challenging experience in my life. One that will make me drastically different in the world, outside the shelters of the Jesuit experience.

And I could find out... Loneliness could just be an imagination.

Missed Vienna Teng Album

Dreaming Through The Noise. I can't believe I missed Vienna Teng's next album by 2 years. It has been so long, has it?

Maybe it IS time to pull out from the garbage and wreckage, and come out from the water, breathing. Missing this latest album is quite unforgivable in my book.

Whatever You Want

he's a company man, your right hand
13 years and counting
no detectable ambitions, a model of efficiency,
far as you can see

he knows every loophole, the art of fine print
massaging the numbers 'til they fit
and every time you ask him for another vanishing act
he half-smiles as if to say

whatever you want,
whatever you want,
whatever you want is fine by me

never a real moment together,
but she understands; you're an important man
another late night,
don't know if you're coming home or when
she's alone again

but she goes on curating your domestic museum
she disappears in her loyalty
she is a dress, wearing a face in the doorway
opening her arms out to you

whatever you want,
whatever you want,
whatever you want is fine by me

no one would dare to question you, oh no
no one would dare to stand up

but in the night she leaves the papers in a tidy pile,
evidence for her reasons
and in the night he takes the main accounts and pulls the files
detailing every treason

i am the last one you'd ever suspect
of setting the fire, of setting the fire
but as you switch on your TV tomorrow morning,
you'll hear me saying quietly

whatever you want,
whatever you want,
whatever you want is fine by me

oh whatever you say,
whatever you say,
i'll do what you ask me
i'll do what you ask me

oh whatever you say,
whatever you say,
but do you know who's listening?

whatever you say,
i know it's over

An Amazing Singer, An Amazing Song

Its amazing how friends come a long way from where they were years ago.
My soprano choirmate, in one of her usual forms. Amazing song, too :

哭不出來

Ben Folds - Landed

Something that I've rediscovered. To those who knows how it feels, by all means. Capital piano accompaniments by Ben Folds.

We'd hit the bottom
I thought it was my fault
And in a way I guess it was
I'm just now finding out
What it was all about

We'd moved to the west coast
Away from everyone
She never told me that you called
Back when I was still
I was still in love

'Till I opened my eyes and walked out the door
And the clouds came tumbling down
And it's bye-bye goodbye I tried
And I twisted it wrong just to make it right
I had to leave myself behind
And I've been flying high all night

So come pick me up
I've landed...

The daily dramas
She made from nothing
So nothing ever made it right

She liked to push me
And talk me back down
'Till i believed I was the crazy one
And in a way
I guess I was

'Till I opened my eyes and walked out the door
And the clouds came tumbling down
And it's bye-bye goodbye I tried
Treading the sea of a troubled mind
I had to leave myself behind
Singin' bye-bye goodbye I tried

If you wrote me off
I'd understand it
'Cause I've been on
Some other planet
So come pick me up
I've landed...

And you will be so
Happy to know
I've come along
It's over

And I opened my eyes and walked out the door
And the clouds came tumbling down
And it's bye-bye goodbye I tried
Down comes the reign of the telephone czar
It's okay to call
And I will answer for myself
Come pick me up...
Come pick me up...
I've landed.

Moonrise

I saw the moon rise tonight... A full, bright moon hanging just above the mountains, under clear skies.

It was one of the most beautiful things I've seen, even better than the one I've seen when I was riding a small boat in Putoushan 5-6 years ago.

I managed to get a shot with my iPhone, but its not quite as pretty as how it was when you were there. It'll be uploaded later (once I figure out how the heck to drag out the pics from my iPhone %!#%!@#!).

I wish, she could have seen it...

Love is

Many of us are no stranger to strong emotions - We live life experiencing a plethora of states that strongly drives us to do many exceptional things. Instant fear is a predominant one, immediately triggering in us lightning quick reflexes that has been fundamental to life and death decisions. Our ancestors benefited from fear, aiding them by driving their adrenaline to instantly spurt out of harm's way, in cases of extreme danger - the appearance of a rattlesnake defending its brood, or an angry wild boar rushing to attack to its defense - so as it is now in our present time, when a man may suddenly try to ricochet himself away in the onset of an ominous traffic accident.

On the other hand, there is sadness. Sadly, extreme sadness pushes some of us to end our short lives, while in others, it becomes a motivating factor and an iron steel resolve to live as long as possible to eliminate all bouts of causes that will lead to unhappiness. Pioneers of charitable organizations, enlightened by poverty, inequality or existing social conditions, are driven by the desolation and hardship of others to push forward and alleviate the current situation, implementing and executing monumental projects that drive revolutionary change. Others are driven to excel in different fields - medicine, technology, process - to speed up what would be otherwise be a relative slow pace of progress.

And then there is one we're all quite familiar with - love.

From the very first breath we take, all of us are exposed to varying degrees of love. The secure cradle of a mother with her child against her warm bosom, the slow lull of lullabye sung by grandparents, the company of schoolmates, the camaraderie of colleagues, the warmth of relatives, a lasting friendship, a committed relationship, a promise to God - all these are varying aspects.

But like everything in this world, there is a danger of misinterpreting ideas... whether by being miscommunicated, mislead by the pervading norm, or rationally forcing them to be our own. Ideals and abstracts can be easily interpreted or understood to be wrong, just because they are what they are - vague, all applicable, bendable.

I do not proclaim that my version is correct... but I have to admit, I believe in ideals, and very much critical in my own actions brought about by it. I live my life to attain them, and it will desperately pain me to know that my understanding may be faulty. So, here is my version of what love is, and what I live by, for it.

What Love is not -

• Love is not a fleeting emotion - you're mistaking it with passion.
  
• Love is not a feeling - that's only your head talking to your heart to beat faster.
• Love is not a whim - it does not come and go as it pleases
  
• Love is not short term - its not an on and off switch

It is not how many of Hollywood movies portray love to be - a sweeping, off-the-floor feeling that leaves your knees weak, and your heart beating rapidly, and with an uncontrollable urge to kiss the one you love. It is not relationships - although love does bear fruit to them. It is neither chemistry between two people - although it does help to initiate it - nor is it a butterfly-in-your-stomach feeling.

In fact, love is not a feeling at all.

What love it is, is a deliberate, thoughtful and committed action. It is a decision and a long lasting commitment. Imagine the love of the mother for her child, rearing the child as it grows into adulthood, or the lasting marriage of an old, amiable couple together for 50 years. Imagine the love of a man for a cause worth fighting for, and dying for it, unwilling to bend into any alternative to the cause.

And yet, a long lasting commitment is not an easy thing. Many of us encounter conflicts in life - no one said life was easy and smooth sailing. Change is an integral part of life. Nothing stays still in this world. The mother will have to brave her child as he or she grows into adolescence, and as an adult with his or her own firm opinion on things. Each of the couple will change in those many years,... priorities change, perceptions and points of view adjust, sometimes drastically, sometimes not. The man will encounter and temptations to steer him away from his ideals... but with love as a hard, solid decision, and commitment, they will persevere.

If love was a feeling, then feelings can change at anytime. Then the mother will abandon her child once he or she is not pliable. The couple will break and separate once they find that they've lost the feeling,... and the man will find it unbearable once temptation ensues, and finally breaking in.

One very important thing to take note of... A committed decision involves integrity, knowledge, and self independence. Do not mistake love between couples as a dependence of two devoted, committed people. Dependence is a result of the committed decision... both remain as separate, independent persons, deciding to come together. Should one be dependent.. then it is not love for that person, but a strange, parasitic relation. Be cautious of those that hide behind the cover of love.

Finally... Love as it is - a commitment and decision - would, and will stand the test of time. And even if the past tense of love is used, the memories surrounding it will never cease to exist. It will be remembered, willingly or not, as it is a powerful motivator by its own right.

Love is simple, yet complicated. It is not so easy to achieve, and will always bring hardship, pain and tears. And for those who have it, as it is described here, in its purest form, they have my highest regards. Because once everything has been done and passed, love bears fruit to the most wonderful of things - A child growing with integrity, and loving her mother back... a couple that will inspire those around them, and a Man that will sacrifice himself for humanity.

And finally, a familiar and traditional description of how love is...

Corinthians 14:3
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

This post is to celebrate what love is - to mothers, couples, and the Man devoted to humanity - and all the beautiful things that grow from it.

A 3-Day Intermission / An Explanation On What Has Transpired

The entry following this, was originally going to be my post, before things went drastically wrong last Friday. I was ashamed to publish it, that very night, because I thought that I would have been a hypocrite, having failed in the most important of things. I invested a considerable time last Friday to take care of friends, a testament to what I firmly believe everyone should be, and yet, after trying so hard to prevent what I feared to happen to my loved ones, it broke my heart to discover that someone living so physically close to me, was living the same desolation, and loneliness,... and reaching the breaking point.

I was ashamed.

Maybe I could not do anything, she never existed to me, but despite that... maybe I could've done something that MATTERED. The world in which we live in, is a web of interactions. It is an important point to acknowledge this. More than once in my life, my day would be brightened by a random act of kindness, by a stranger - It gave renewed glimmer of hope to a tired soul, and rekindle a fire and a motivation that, yes, things could be better.

I've lived through three days wondering what went wrong. I have had sleepless, troubled nights, and no motivation whatsoever to do anything. Finally, I realized I had to write it down.

I do not advocate suicide, but needed to plead on their case - The world does not need another critical essay on how some people give up on life. It doesn't need to instill fear of possibly eternal damnation (take your pick on religion), or how they have abandoned their responsibilities, and callously thrown way so carelessly the love and indebtedness they should feel towards the people in their lives. I needed people on the other end of the spectrum to understand that, at some point, reason or logic will not work. It will be ruled by fear and extreme emotion.

It is a responsibility to the people around to make things better. Those that are incapacitated have to be lifted up. Their choices should be respected, no matter how irrational, but, as a person, wouldn't you feel responsible for something that you knew that maybe, you could have had a chance to change?

I hope that the article would give a small perspective on understanding how lonely, abandoned people feel. I do not pretend I fully understand, but I am well aware of how loneliness, desolation and violence feels, and I hope it could help you change your mind and give you a sense of responsibility and action. I'm also well aware I could not do everything, so I am pleading help from everyone to do their part. It doesn't take much effort. Even a random act may turn around someone.

In turn, I realized that what I was about to post that night, has more weight than ever. Shame aside, it needs to be posted. It hit home, in an eerie, foresighted manner, as I strangely used the exact same example that transpired last Friday night. I realized finally, that these two posts are related, and it is a two part article that will make up a whole.

The first part of the article remains unchanged. Only the definition of the main post was expounded today, to give more breath and depth to the point being relayed.

I hope that you will see the significance, just as I did, when I realized it during these past traumatic few days. I hope that it will move you to make a difference.

Besides, all I can do is hope. And someone said hope is quite hard to kill.

Downturn of Events

I was initially going to post an upbeat entry today. One that mattered. Something that made a difference. The day started out quite nice,... one that was hopeful...

I cannot bring myself to come up with the right words to say how I feel right now. Empty. A water hole with no drop of substance. She was there. I did not know her. I did not see her. No one did. But she only came to BE, when she died.

Yes.... Everything drained away... earlier tonight. No one cared. No one seemed to care. I do not understand... Why? Why would someone would cut off all ties and decide to end their lives?

When they did, did they have their eyes open? did they have their eyes closed? Did they wonder how it would feel like? Falling across the expanse of the stars, each one watching intently, behind the gaze of the full bright moon, as winds whipped and flared across their faces, falling faster and faster?

Did they desperately hope that finally, the earth would wrap herself around their shoulders, and finally cradle them to peace?

... do ... I ... understand?....


....
....
....


.... maybe ... I .... do....


Yes... Loneliness is a soft, silent world. A constant droning at the background, never once ceasing. A place where the entirety of the world is illuminated by lone stars, as lonely.. each of them sparkling, each its own tune... all watching, all waiting.. and yet, they are as far away from where you are, as you are with them. It is a world where all eyes are intent - on you, and you alone. But not always. They all shine differently, at different times, at their own whims, at their convenient time. And the moon... always looks across, in a stern, solid tone, lasting forever, illuminating everything in the world. And yet, it does not lighten the darkness enveloping around. Shadows lurk in corners amongst concrete, never reaching out. The heart will be always in the dark, as silent, and as black as it is naturally is where loneliness rules... and the wind... will always be dead. The silence.. deafening.


Yes, there will be a smile when the wind whips across her face. There will be hesitation, regret, hurt, bleeding... and yet ... an anticipation of everlasting peace. Yes, the deadness will be gone then... so will the droning, to be replaced by whistling of pure, live air. The stars will stop their incessant sparkling, for a pure, solid moment, and all will stop to be finally intent on you. Yes, mother earth will reach out once you see that the ground is moving as fast towards you, and you would want to rush towards it.

And... they will all have their eyes... closed... but it will be as open as it will ever be, during those last few moments:


"Anticipation. Hope. Rest. Peace... and everything that has been taken away from me..."


When all hope has gone, everything will be waiting on the other side. A grand welcome. A soft sad smile..

Was there no one there? Where were the people who were replaced by the loneliness? Where were the living stars that surrounded her? Did they all concentrate on their petty, daily lives, as if everything was important, except for a small, crumbling soul? Did they grow up to learn that all can fend for themselves, when maturity sets in? Did society start teaching us that everything else was more important, except for babies that could not yet walk, old men and women who could barely help themselves...?

Life never ceases until Death stops us at our doors. Life is always about learning, whether one is 1,15 or 60 years of age. Whatever made us all think, that a 49 year old woman, can withstand better than a crying new born babe?

All of us cry inside. We all just don't show it.

No one should ever live in loneliness... not in this world, or the next.

Partners and Marriage

Below is a snippet from a widely circulated email of which gives description to two of the more well known professors from my university. Although there are inconsistent facts on the description relating to the source of the article, it nevertheless gives a certain perspective to the weight of the article itself, and also therefore I am including it in. Further explanation on the source of the article will be added at the end of this post.

====================================================

Eduardo Calasanz was a student at the Ateneo de Manila University, Philippines, where he had Father Ferriols as professor. Father Ferriols, meanwhile at that time, was the Philosophy department head. Currently he still teaches Philosophy for graduating college students in Ateneo.

Father Ferriols has been very popular for his mind-opening and enriching classes but was also notorious for the grades he gives. Still people took his classes for the learning and deep insight they take home with them every day (if only they could do something about the grades….. )

Anyway, come grade giving time, (Ateneo has letter grading systems, the highest being an A, lowest at D, with F for flunk), Fr Ferriols had this long discussion with the registrar people because he wanted to give Calasanz an A+. Either that or he doesn’t teach at all… Calasanz got his A+.

Read the paper below to find out why.

PARTNERS AND MARRIAGE

I have never met a man who didn’t want to be loved. But I have seldom met a man who didn’t fear marriage.Something about the closure seems constricting, not enabling. Marriage seems easier to understand for what it cuts out of our lives than for what it makes possible within our lives.

When I was younger this fear immobilized me. I did not want to make a mistake. I saw my friends get married for reasons of social acceptability, or sexual fever, or just because they thought it was the logical thing to do. Then I watched, as they and their partners became embittered and petty in their dealings with each other. I looked at older couples and saw, at best, mutual toleration of each other. I imagined a lifetime of loveless nights and bickering days and could not imagine subjecting myself or someone else to such a fate.

And yet, on rare occasions, I would see old couples who somehow seemed to glow in each other’s presence. They seemed really in love, not just dependent upon each other and tolerant of each other’s foibles.

It was an astounding sight, and it seemed impossible. How, I asked myself, can they have survived so many years of sameness, so much irritation at the others habits? What keeps love alive in them, when most of us seem unable to even stay together, much less love each other?

The central secret seems to be in choosing well. There is something to the claim of fundamental compatibility. Good people can create a bad relationship, even though they both dearly want the relationship to succeed.

It is important to find someone with whom you can create a good relationship from the outset. Unfortunately, it is hard to see clearly in the early stages.

Sexual hunger draws you to each other and colors the way you see yourselves together. It blinds you to the thousands of little things by which relationships eventually survive or fail. You need to find a way to see beyond this initial overwhelming sexual fascination. Some people choose to involve themselves sexually and ride out the most heated period of sexual attraction in order to see what is on the other side. This can work, but it can also leave a trail of wounded hearts. Others deny the sexual side altogether in an attempt to get to know each other apart from their sexuality. But they cannot see clearly, because the presence of unfulfilled sexual desire looms so large that it keeps them from having any normal perception of what life would be like together.

The truly lucky people are the ones who manage to become long-time friends before they realize they are attracted to each other. They get to know each other’s laughs, passions, sadness, and fears. They see each other at their worst and at their best. They share time together before they get swept up into the entangling intimacy of their sexuality. This is the ideal, but not often possible. If you fall under the spell of your sexual attraction immediately, you need to look beyond it for other keys to compatibility.

One of these is laughter. Laughter tells you how much you will enjoy each others company over the long term. If your laughter together is good and healthy, and not at the expense of others, then you have a healthy relationship to the world. Laughter is the child of surprise. If you can make each other laugh, you can always surprise each other. And if you can always surprise each other, you can always keep the world around you new.

Beware of a relationship in which there is no laughter. Even the most intimate relationships based only on seriousness have a tendency to turn sour. Over time, sharing a common serious viewpoint on the world tends to turn you against those who do not share the same viewpoint, and your relationship can become based on being critical together.

After laughter, look for a partner who deals with the world in a way you respect. When two people first get together, they tend to see their relationship as existing only in the space between the two of them. They find each other endlessly fascinating, and the overwhelming power of the emotions they are sharing obscures the outside world. As the relationship ages and grows, the outside world becomes important again.

If your partner treats people or circumstances in a way you can’t accept, you will inevitably come to grief.

Look at the way he/she cares for others and deals with the daily affairs of life. If that makes you love her more, your love will grow. If it does not, be careful. If you do not respect the way you each deal with the world around you, eventually the two of you will not respect each other.

Look also at how your partner confronts the mysteries of life. We live on the cusp of poetry and practicality, and the real life of the heart resides in the poetic. If one of you is deeply affected by the mystery of the unseen in life and relationships, while the other is drawn only to the literal and the practical, you must take care that the distance does not become an unbridgeable gap that leaves you each feeling isolated and misunderstood.

There are many other keys, but you must find them by yourself. We all have unchangeable parts of our hearts that we will not betray and private commitments to a vision of life that we will not deny. If you fall in love with someone who cannot nourish those inviolable parts of you, or if you cannot nourish them in her, you will find yourselves growing further apart until you live in separate worlds where you share the business of life, but never touch each other where the heart lives and dreams. From there it is only a small leap to the cataloging of petty hurts and daily failures that leaves so many couples bitter and unsatisfied with their mates.

So choose carefully and well. If you do, you will have chosen a partner with whom you can grow, and then the real miracle of marriage can take place in your hearts. I pick my words carefully when I speak of a miracle. But I think it is not too strong a word.

There is a miracle in marriage. It is called transformation. Transformation is one of the most common events of nature. The seed becomes the flower. The cocoon becomes the butterfly. Winter becomes spring and love becomes a child. We never question these, because we see them around us every day. To us they are not miracles, though if we did not know them they would be impossible to believe.

Marriage is a transformation we choose to make. Our love is planted like a seed, and in time it begins to flower. We cannot know the flower that will blossom, but we can be sure that a bloom will come. If you have chosen carefully and wisely, the bloom will be good. If you have chosen poorly or for the wrong reason, the bloom will be flawed.

We are quite willing to accept the reality of negative transformation in a marriage. It was negative transformation that always had me terrified of the bitter marriages that I feared when I was younger. It never occurred to me to question the dark miracle that transformed love into harshness and bitterness. Yet I was unable to accept the possibility that the first heat of love could be transformed into something positive that was actually deeper and more meaningful than the heat of fresh passion. All I could believe in was the power of this passion and the fear that when it cooled I would be left with something lesser and bitter.

But there is positive transformation as well. Like negative transformation, it results from a slow accretion of little things. But instead of death by a thousand blows, it is growth by a thousand touches of love. Two histories intermingle. Two separate beings, two separate presences, two separate consciousness come together and share a view of life that passes before them. They remain separate, but they also become one. There is an expansion of awareness, not a closure and a constriction, as I had once feared. This is not to say that there is not tension and there are not traps. Tension and traps are part of every choice of life, from celibate to monogamous to having multiple lovers. Each choice contains within it the lingering doubt that the road not taken somehow more fruitful and exciting, and each becomes dulled to the richness that it alone contains.

But only marriage allows life to deepen and expand and be leavened by the knowledge that two have chosen, against all odds, to become one. Those who live together without marriage can know the pleasure of shared company, but there is a specific gravity in the marriage commitment that deepens that experience into something richer and more complex.

So do not fear marriage, just as you should not rush into it for the wrong reasons. It is an act of faith and it contains within it the power of transformation. If you believe in your heart that you have found someone with whom you are able to grow, if you have sufficient faith that you can resist the endless attraction of the road not taken and the partner not chosen, if you have the strength of heart to embrace the cycles and seasons that your love will experience, then you may be ready to seek the miracle that marriage offers. If not, then wait. The easy grace of a marriage well made is worth your patience. When the time comes, a thousand flowers will bloom…endlessly.

====================================================

Someone contacted Mr. Eduardo Calasanz to ask if he wrote this essay. And here is his reply:

———————————————————————————————–

I did not write that piece.

I received it sometime in 1997 and liked it so much that I forwarded it to
many people. The article carried no by-line. After a few months, I got
some messages congratulating me for having written it. Obviously, it was
now going around the internet with my name on it as the author. I wish I
could have written it, but the simple truth is that I didn’t. Nobody, as
far as I knew, claimed authorship.

When I was still in France a few years ago, a short bio sketch (pure urban
legend!) was appended to the piece. And so it went. Even a former
girlfriend of mine had gotten wind of it!

C’est la vie. The long and short of it.

Some years ago, a friend of a former student of mine gave an
indication conerning the source of “Partners and Marriage”. Just to set
the record straight the article is in fact a chapter from a book
entitled Letters to My Son, A Father’s Wisdom on Manhood, Women, Life, and
Love written by Kent Nerburn. It was published in New York by the New
World Library in 1994, but seems to have gone out of print for a while.
Chapter 26 is entitled “Partners and Marriage”. The book has been back
in print since.

I would appreciate it if you could share this rectification with others
who may be inquiring.

Very truly yours,

EDUARDO JOSE E. CALASANZ
Asst. Professor of Philosophy
School of Humanities
Ateneo de Manila University
P.O. Box 154 Manila
Philippines

And You Wonder What I Do In The Gym...

Here's a link. I joined an earlier session...

For those who've always wondered why I go to the gym every week, at least 4 times a week, and at the peak of my obsession, at most 16 hours in a week...

A similar choreography to the one I attended
This should be a good one too!

Exercising could never be THIS fun!