Is Letting Go same as Giving Up?

I've never been the one on giving up.

First thing that comes to mind, was my first relationship. On and off, arguments and fights, sorries and apologies - it was a horrifying experience, where pieces where desperately glued together. Hopes and imaginations run amok. The first time we broke it off, everything seemed surreal - It couldn't be happening. Maybe the phone would ring. Or I would receive a text message in a bit. Days passed to weeks, weeks to several months. Nothing.

I figured I might as well get on with my life.

Then he called back. Or was it me? I can't seem to remember. But we became friends... and things seemed alright. But after a few months... things started to get bad again. And I had to go through the same cycle all over again. It couldn't be real. Things seemed surreal. I'll wake up and find everything patched up - maybe. Three long years...

But it didn't.

A few months later, the second one came along. And it was short and sweet. But it turned surreal too. As surreal as it can get. I tried rationalizing this time, but failing miserably. A lot of wasted phone batteries, drama, hand burns and a broken wrist. But it was still surreal. But I eventually went back to real life, too.

But then, there was also the enclosed world that I lived in. Whenever I was debugging codes, finishing programming projects, figuring out Physics theories, calculating mathematical problems - time seemed caged into a loop. It was me, and the problem in front of me. No one could whisk me out of my reverie. That was surreal, too. I won't move until its done... and I would concentrate so much at I would jerk out of my seat when someone tapped me behind the shoulder.

Then philosophy came along, and launched an all out attack.

Absolutism. Escapism. Ideals. Sacrifice. Understanding. Value.

It made things so much worse, and so much harder. Now I had rationalism and logic to back up my previously immature stubborness. Why things should be the way they are. Why they aren't. What I could possibly do to attain it. What I had to endure. What I had to put up with. What I had to do to keep myself steady.

Now, I live in the surreal world all the time.

And I'm now back to where I started. When do you learn to know the best way is to let go? Is it synonymous to giving up? I don't want to give up. But is letting go about giving up? When do you decide that the best way to achieve the ideal, is to give up?

Stubborn streaks are hard to manage. Am I playing God? When you're a parent, when do you decide to stop sheltering your child and letting go so that they can learn by themselves? When do you stop to scold a teenage son to follow the things that you believe are right, learned though years of experience? When do you stop to show people what is right, and what is wrong, even if they end up not listening?

When do you begin to sacrifice your heart and mind to be broken, so as to hope that people learn?

Surreal, or reality?